Episode 31: Done

So I finished the dress a month ago but for some reason I put off announcing it here. I think it’s partly because I don’t want to show pictures now that it’s done, because crappy cell phone shots with bad lighting may have completely sufficed for blog photography during the production stage but I don’t want the world to see my first (and, dear god, last) wedding dress creation through the lens of a 3-year-old iPhone. BUT, it’s done, really, really done…it’s not perfect, but I will say this: Nick has been helping me every step of the way with this thing, from planning to math to “does this look weird? WHY DOES THIS LOOK SO WEIRD?!”, and even though he had always said that he didn’t want to see me in the dress until The Day he had resigned himself to having to help me troubleshoot it once I had finished putting everything together. I finished it late at night after some, uh, completely reasonable amount of alcohol had been consumed and decided to wait until the next day to try it on, and then woke up early in the morning freakishly excited. I snuck downstairs without waking Nick up and managed to zip myself into my two-layer tulle slip all by myself, and as soon as I had the dress on I realized it didn’t need to be troubleshot (troubleshat?). It was, to me at least, perfect.

Part of that perfection is that it’s really not that perfect (hahaha…oh god. I may have also put off writing this because wow, I suck). It’s pretty fucking obvious that the thing was handmade by someone with no prior dress-making experience. You hang that bitch on a Kleinfeld’s mannequin and you’re not gonna fool anyone, but it’s not like I need to. I knit my own dress and I like it, and hopefully my guests mostly know about it so they won’t make mean comments. At least not to my face. Hopefully.

Anyway, we’re five weeks and one day out from The Holy-Crap-This-Is-Really-Happening Day, and I’m not completely wigging out anymore. Since I am — and you may not have known this about me — actually insane, I decided to also crochet full bouquets for myself and my bridesmaids, and the guys’ boutonnieres, so it’s not like I have to worry about idle hands.

Sidebar: Whenever I see or hear anything about “DIY weddings” from here on out, I reserve the right to fall to the floor laughing. You made favor boxes and bunting? HAHAHA SUCK IT, AMATEUR. I mean, not like it’s a competition or anything.

Anyway anyway, Ill be back probably in like five weeks and two days with nice pictures of the dress. Maybe even with me inside of it. Who knows.

2 responses

  1. Well, I just spent an hour reading your blog while I let my man toil in the hot sun with his parents shoveling manure for their vegetable garden they cannot possibly ever be done with, your blog was over all the best advice I have found for a knit wedding dress. You have left me very hopeful, and I now have a weird sincere hope of knitting my wedding dress. Unlike you though I only have a year, but I am a speed knitter and if I can do what you call an Aunt Irma sweater in about two and half weeks, maybe I can get this done with a veil! Also, I love making up my own patterns, that is literally all I do, I learn the stitch and can manipulate it into projects like the wicked witch. 🙂 Thank you so much for your sick knitting blog.

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